Jessica Gottlieb

I am not (often) a narcissist

Feliz Navidad: And Don’t Forget The Prozac

with 7 comments

It’s almost 10 and a little drizzly here in Los Angeles. My coffee is hot and my son sits shivering in front of the new Playstation we gave them for Chanukkah. My daughter and my husband sleep late and in a few moments I’ll wake them and ask them to get out of bed. I wont’ necessarily have something for them to do, but they should be upright with eyes open.

They city is absurdly quiet and I remember just how much I hated living in rural Colorado all those years ago.

Friends are having meltdowns and another jumps on the injectible bandwagon (restalyne or juviderm, who knows?) to fill in imaginary lines that only a camera can see. We giggle that it’s funny, and how we are products of our environment, but no one whispers, and in quiet moments we all know that it’s depression.

It’s depression in a plastic surgeon’s office, and women in this town wear their sadness in the form of unmoving eyebrows, creaseless smiles, frozen top lips and absurdly trim midsections. Our deepest sadness can be made pretty for $1,250 and an oral block.

I resist the fix because my daughter is watching. Intently.

Still others have mixed feelings about the day and update their facebook status to reflect that. They get a few pings, private messages sending them hugs and love. I hope and pray, they get what they need. It’s a lot of pressure to be joyful today, as a bit of a curmudgeon, I can understand not always feeling the joy.

I’ll cook a little and play games with the family. Then we’ll schlep all over the Hollywood Hills to enjoy the hipsters and the booze and the company. Later we’ll hang with our children’s friends and then I’ll wipe off my lipstick while surrounded by women who know what you’re thinking before you say it. And they support you, no matter what.

I’ll try to enjoy the silence of the day. Frankly, a city this quiet is a little disquieting and doesn’t work all that well for me.

Merry Everything.
Don’t let the silence give you a headache.


Written by Jessica Gottlieb

December 25, 2008 at 10:00 am

7 Responses

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  1. I really appreciate this today, Jessica. The holidays don’t just remind people of the things they have to be grateful for, but they remind us of what we’ve lost. In my case, well… Anyway, thank you so much! The best wishes to you and yours!

    The Loss Adjuster

    December 25, 2008 at 10:37 am

  2. You obviously don’t live in an apartment.

    I do. I slept in.

    Guy upstairs is vacuuming as I debate Advil for the birthday party last night.

    Quiet can be maddening, true. Vacuuming can be worse.

    Wonder if I ask if he’ll do my apartment, too?


    December 25, 2008 at 11:07 am

  3. That was haunting. I’ve had quite the day. From an over stimulated kid, to a grease fire at he aunt’s house. I am trying to remember that I don’t drink, because if I did….


    December 25, 2008 at 3:03 pm

  4. Jessica, thanks so much for offering a different perspective on today. Much appreciated.


    December 25, 2008 at 7:16 pm

  5. That was great… I was overly-stressed out on Wednesday night and needed a reminder of what this was all about and also that people don’t change. We can either accept them or go crazy.

    I took an ambien so I could sleep.

    I haven’t had much Christmas spirit this year, but I think I made a reasonable attempt at faking it and my son never knew.

    Mrs Pop

    December 26, 2008 at 8:29 am

  6. I’m reveling in the quiet right now at work. So far, I’m the only one here. No need to hide the fact that all I’m doing is catching up on my Reader.
    Hope your family is enjoying an excellent holiday season!


    December 26, 2008 at 8:44 am

  7. I think that people get caught up in what they think they should do. People were shocked that I didn’t go home for Christmas, while my parents were supposed to be sad that they had no one in the house.

    However, they were delighted to have a day free of kids and grandkids and eat chocolate in their bathrobes. I was delighted to have a day with my LA family. I’m glad that you guys are a part of it, because your family is simply delightful.


    the slackmistress

    December 26, 2008 at 1:42 pm

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